So I haven't written in weeks. About two weeks to be exact, since Hurricane
Sandy wripped through my area and left us without power for over a week. During this week I stayed at a relatives during which I had yet another flare up with my MS. I was put back on the steroid IV. It seems like with each flare up a little more life is just sucked out of me, stolen from me. I love writing. But everytime I try to sit down to continue with my book I just stare at that blank page and feel nothing. My motivation seems to be in hiding. I don't want to just write anything so words can fill the pages. I want to be of meaning and purpose. Does anyone other writer get into this funk? I do find writing therapeutic so I should try a bit harder. I guess the pessismistic side of me likes to rear its ugly head sometimes. It tells me, "Why are you even doing this?" "What's the point?" "It isn't going to amount to anything." "You won't finish this just like you don't finish anything else." Maybe I should really consider shoving a sock into the mouth of that pessimistic jerk! HA. I guess I really need to take my own advice and realize this book is not going to be something that will dash me into the world of famous writers. (What I always wanted to be.) Maybe I just need to realize it is about getting my voice heard and conveing a message. When your passion is gone you just feel so empty. It's that little glimmer of hope, a small vision of a dream, that keeps you running. I need to find my passion again. Feeling like an empty shell just isn't going to help me with any part of my life.
5 Comments
11/13/2012 03:03:05
Hello Lisa,
Reply
Lisa
11/13/2012 08:53:00
Thank you once again James for your words of wisdom. I didn't think I was stressing too much about the hurricane but maybe I hide it well, even from myself haha. I guess I am a bit down because I have had so many flare ups this year. Getting knocked down over and over again, then getting back up is exhausting. You all of people, I know, totally understand. I shouldn't complain. You have primary progressive and probably are dealing with a lot more than I am. I should be grateful, and truely I am. Just sometimes it's hard to keep that sunny outlook. You are right about the book. It will always be there to attend to and I shouldn't put pressure or a timeline on myself. This book is something I wanted to do to give us normal people with MS a voice. I need to remember that and not treat it any other way. I am not looking for fame or fortune from this book. I just truely enjoy writing and just to see my book on a book shelf will be a grand accomplishment for me. Again James, thank you for your encouragement. I am looking forward to the holidays and hope you are also. Stay in touch. Take care.
Reply
James Stirzaker
11/13/2012 21:02:23
Hi Lisa
Reply
11/13/2012 21:03:14
Hi Lisa
Reply
Lisa
11/14/2012 09:42:34
Hi James,
Reply
Leave a Reply. |
Lisa's NookMy own thoughts, views, and whatever else tickles my fancy. Categories
All
|